"Use self-affirmation to escape tunnel vision After losing twin girls through a surrogate, Maya Shankar found herself devastated and resistant when her husband suggested a gratitude exercise — she called it "Instagram BS" and "toxic positivity." But when she relented and listed what gave her life meaning, she realized she "had been so single-mindedly focused on becoming a mom" that she "had completely forgotten about how otherwise rich and multi-dimensional" her life was. The research-backed tool, called a self-affirmation exercise, simply asks you to write down every identity and source of meaning that has NOT been threatened by the change. Doing this during a crisis doesn't erase pain, but it widens your field of view so one closed door no longer looks like the only door. Source: Maya Shankar, The Mel Robbins Podcast, Life Takes a Turn"